Many of my readers keep asking what I think about Bristol being part of the cast on “Dancing with the Stars.” I at first hesitated to respond to that because I do not want my blog to be focused on Bristol Palin.

However, I noticed that the questions keep coming so I feel that I need to address them.

Once I found out that Bristol would be one of the cast members on “Dancing with the Stars” I was honestly somewhat shocked and a little disgusted. How can Levi and our family see Tripp while she is away in LA practicing her dance routines? That was my first concern. It has been months since I last saw my precious nephew and now it is clear that it will be many more months before I see him again.

Along with my constant concern for my nephew, what really bothered me, with all due respect to other teen mothers out there, is that I believe this is sending the WRONG message to other teens.

They’re going to look at this as, Bristol Palin got pregnant as a teen, and now she is famous! They will see her being offered multiple opportunities, being cast on a sitcom, joining the cast of “Dancing with the Stars”, all while making hundreds of thousands of dollars. For many teens it will appear that the road to success is through unprotected sex.

I really hope that the media will realize that this kind of thing is sending the message to other young teens that this is glamorous and a way to get a lot of attention. Since Bristol became pregnant, and made headlines world wide, teen pregnancy in Wasilla has sky rocketed!

Everywhere I look I see somebody who is expecting a new baby. If you go into a public restroom there is writing on the walls saying:

“Is it bad that I’m 15 and want a baby soooo bad?”

“I would give anything to have a baby!”

“I want to be a mommy at 14!”

And many other extremely disturbing and jaw dropping messages. I think that having Bristol on television dancing along with those other so-called celebrities is just going to reinforce the idea in the minds of many teens that having a baby can make you glamorous and famous, and you will get tons of attention. Which of course is absolutely ridiculous! Yet many of these girls are just screaming for attention and believe this is a way to get it.

After I read those messages on the restroom wall, I actually took a picture of them with my cell phone because I was so completely shocked by how many young girls are writing them. It seems that it is becoming a trend!

I showed my dad the pictures, and at first he was wondering why in the world I took a picture of the bathroom wall, but when I explained to him how many teens are TRYING to get pregnant in response to all of the attention, money, and fame that Bristol was receiving, he shook his head in disgust.

He just looked at me and we both immediately knew what the other was thinking. How sad these young girl’s lives must be for them to believe that becoming pregnant was their only hope of finding love and getting attention from those around them. I wish I could reach out to these young girls and explain to them that they have their whole lives ahead of them, and there are other ways to get attention without going out and sleeping around just to receive gifts at a baby shower, have people comment on your belly, and buy cute baby clothes.

I just don’t think many of them realize how many responsibilities come with a new baby, and that parenting is essentially a full time job that lasts the rest of your life.

I think that as a speaker for the Candie’s Foundation, and advocate for abstinence, that Bristol should be spreading a message that speaks to the difficulties of motherhood, and pounding home the idea that, yes she is now famous for being a teen mom, but THAT it is not the right decision for the majority of the teenage girls out there.

She should talk about just how hard it is to manage a “full time job and college” while being a “single mother”. Instead I believe she is focused on the opportunity to wear fancy gowns and jewelry, and appear fabulous on TV. Not exactly an opportunity offered to other single teenage mothers in this country.

I do hope she does well on the show, and I sincerely mean that! However for purely selfish reasons I hope she gets to come home sooner, rather than later, so that I can hopefully hold my nephew in my arms before too much time goes by.

Here is just some of the bathroom graffiti I have seen in Wasilla.

This week I have been racking my brain trying to figure out what I should write about for my next post.

Well after I went over and I checked the blog Immoral Minority it clicked. I read the post Gryphen wrote about my mother’s weekly UA’s and I wanted to add my two cents.

Although I know it is required by the courts it still angers me that for the next two years I have to live my life around these random UA’s.

They will not allow my mother to drive because she is taking medications for her pain which means that I always have to make myself available to drive her to and from Palmer. ( Palmer is about 20 minutes away. 16 miles from our house).

Sometimes while waiting in the parking lot for my mother to come back out I see other EM clients driving themselves to their appointments and it really kind of irritates me.

But even if she was allowed to drive it would still not be possible because my dad got her car in the divorce settlement. So I guess that leaves it up to me.

It is not that I mind taking care of my mom, believe me I don’t, but not only does the randomness of her UA’s make it virtually impossible to take college classes, the money I spend on gas to get her there, and the miles it puts on my car is outrageous!

I cannot go out like a normal teenager and hang out with friends to watch movies, or play sports, or take in a late dinner, because I have to make sure I am in bed at a decent time every night just in case there is a UA scheduled early in the morning. There can be several UA’s each week as well as visits with mom’s parole officer, not to mention random visits at the house by her PO, and other appointments connected to her conviction. It often makes for a very busy and very chaotic week.

However I know my mom is greatly appreciative of all that I do for her and sometimes has been known to shed tears because of how much she realizes I am sacrificing for her.

I suppose the hardest thing is that some other family members don’t seem to understand, or appreciate, just how much I do.

They still expect me to go out and get a job as well as go to school full time which simply is not possible right now while mom is so dependent on me. It isn’t at all easy and at times the stress is almost unbearable.

Now that Levi and I are back on speaking terms, and are currently working on repairing our relationship, I hope that he will be able to take up some of the slack and give me a break once in a while.

By the way I just need to mention that I really appreciate the support you all have given me and my family. Believe me I don’t take any of it for granted and I always look forward to reading your very supportive comments when you take the time to share your thoughts with me.

First let me apologize for such a long absence.

There has been a lot going on and I have been extremely busy. However I just had to add my two cents concerning the new custody agreement that Levi signed as I know many of you wondered what I thought about it.

When I first I read it my mouth quite literally dropped open and I have to admit I that I was seeing red for a moment. I was extremely upset and still cannot believe that, after all of this time, THIS is the agreement that Levi ended up with.

I cannot comprehend why my brother settled for that, and if Rex and Tank truly had his best interests at heart they would never have let that happen!

But they are much too worried about themselves, and their own publicity, to care about what is best for Levi.

So Levi only gets his son Saturday mornings and Wednesday evenings, that seems like such a random and odd schedule and I just cannot make sense of it. I hope with all my heart that this is just a temporary agreement.

How is it that the agreement states no family is allowed to say critical things about the other family in front of child, when all Bristol does is spy on me in an attempt to find something bad that she can use against me to start drama over on Facebook? Lately it seems that all she has been doing is attempting to add all my friends to her Facebook account, and snoop around in the comments I leave them, or look through the pictures I share, hoping there is something bad in them. But unfortunately for her, there isn’t.

But hey Bristol if you are so interested in what I am up to, and who I am talking to, just send a friend request. I would gladly add you, and then you do not have to skulk around Facebook anymore.

Just to clear up some misconceptions, I do not go out of my way to speak about the Palins or say negative things about them in front of my nephew. When I am with Tripp that is the least of my concerns, and what time I get is too precious to waste it talking about Bristol or the rest of the Palin family. I’m much too busy laughing, smiling, and watching Tripp to see what he has learned, and how much he has grown since our last visit.

I cherish the time I get with my nephew. I do not waste it trying to look for reasons to start drama with Bristol, that just isn’t me.

In fact I want all this to be over with, and wish that others felt the same way so that way we could all move on with our lives. Perhaps then Bristol can stop trolling Facebook looking for proof that I am talking smack about her to my friends. And she can also work on her hypocrisy since I am well aware that she says bad things about me around Tripp all the time.

I have had numerous people tell me so.

And one final piece of business before I wrap up this post. For awhile now I have been trying to get a copy of the deposition that I gave in Anchorage several months ago concerning Levi and Bristol’s custody case. During the deposition Bristol’s attorney, Thomas Van Flein, asked very few questions about Tripp or Levi’s parenting, and instead he used the opportunity to try and intimidate me and to find out what I know about Sarah and Todd. I have been wanting to blog about that day for quite some time and hope to get my hands on a copy of the deposition very soon, however you should know that they are making it very hard for me and claiming that it will cost me a couple hundred dollars just for a copy. But once I do manage to get my hands on it I would love to share it with all of you so that you can see exactly how I, and my family, have been treated by the Palin family when no one is around to see.

I had a feeling that this was going to happen.

I could not help but have serious doubts that Levi and Bristol would make it to the altar.

Let’s make it perfectly clear that I want only the best for my brother and nephew, and wish them all the happiness imaginable. However I don’t see this marriage making that happen. I just believe that in the long run if they were to have gotten married it would have hurt Tripp even worse as he grew older, and wiser, and understood what was going on around him.

I’m just glad that all this chaos has happened while he is so young that he might not remember all the heart ache and drama.

I was there during their entire relationship before Tripp came along, and a little while after he was just born as well, and they simply did not have a healthy relationship.

They were constantly fighting and exchanging harsh, hurtful words, and reacting in ways that would/could hurt Tripp deeply if they got back together and he were to see them acting that way in front of him. I think co-parenting will be great, and maybe as time goes on they can grow up, mature, and build a better relationship in the future. But for now I’m glad they called it off.

It just blows my mind that Bristol would call off the engagement to someone who she “loved and which everything just felt so right” because of petty rumors which she already knew about before she got back together with Levi.

It’s a small town; everyone knows everything within a matter of weeks! There is no way she didn’t know about the rumors circulating about Lanesia! Especially because of how much attention Bristol still pays to Lanesia out of left over middle school jealousy.

I feel like this was a huge set up, and that my brother got played. Again.

I can only imagine the heartache he is going through right now. I know how much he loves both Bristol and Tripp.

My mom just said as she was reading through my post and that she agrees completely with what I wrote. She also believes that based on what she has heard, witnessed, and read recently, that Bristol was just looking for any little excuse to break off the engagement and cause more drama so that she can play the victim.

I also recently read in US weekly magazine a quote from Bristol that said “sorry babe, your sister won’t be attending the wedding”, and the reason given was that I supposedly threatened to “kick her ass in SEVENTH grade.

That was so many years ago, get over it!

To be honest I don’t recall ever threatening to beat her up. But I did tell her off once because I caught her two timing my brother with the boy that I was seeing at the time.

But seriously, can’t she move on and get over middle school spats? If she is as forgiving as her mother claims, there is no way that old arguments should still even be an issue.

Isn’t that right Bristol ? Especially since it was you, and not I, who was in the wrong.

Wow, have the last few weeks been full of surprises or what?

For some time now I have been wanting to put up my mom’s guest post but there has been so much breaking news I am going to have to put that aside until later next week.

Right now I think I have to address the situation concerning Lanesia Garcia.

Lanesia is my brother’s former middle school girlfriend. During their relationship she and I grew close and became good friends, and remained so even after they broke up.

We used to hangout all the time, but since Levi and Bristol got together that first time it has been hell trying to spend time with her.

Bristol and Lanesia use to be friends before Lanesia and Levi broke up. But once they split, and Levi and Bristol got together, Bristol became extremely jealous of Lanesia and no longer wanted anything to do with her. She completely dumped Lanesia as a friend leaving Lanesia feeling betrayed and deeply hurt.

During Levi and Bristol’s entire relationship I have continued to maintain a friendship with Lanesia, and even worked with her for a brief time period. But Bristol simply could not accept that. She would get angry and even yell at Levi, me, and even my MOM for associating with Lanesia.

Here is part of an interview I did back in February about the text messages from Bristol to Levi. That’s my mother in the background saying “We all cried.”

Out of respect for Bristol, and knowing how it felt to be worried about somebody’s ex, I never had Lanesia come over while Levi was home, although I thought that was pretty stupid. However it just wasn’t worth listening to one of Bristol’s temper tantrums.

As a result I would rarely hangout with Lanesia, and if I did it was mostly at her house or we would go out and do something around town.

Believe it or not Bristol would have her friends on the look out for Lanesia’s vehicle at our house. If somebody saw her car I would get random threatening texts from Bristol. She just could not get over the fact that I was still going to be her friend and that I was not going to let her control me.

I find it very immature for Bristol to tell me who I can, and can’t be friends with based on their past relationship with my brother.

To be honest Lanesia and I were not friends when she and Levi first got together. Being the protective sister that I am I really did not warm up to her for quite awhile. But over time she grew on me and I gained a great deal of respect for her. I eventually learned how kind Lanesia was and how much we had in common.

For example ever since the first Christmas and Valentines Day that Levi and Lanesia spent together as a couple, she has always gone out of her way to get a gift for my mother and I, and we would always get her one too.

Now it is kind of like a tradition. Every Christmas and Valentines day I always have a special gift or two from my friend Lanesia.

Well this has always presented a huge problem when it came to dealing with Bristol.

Here is an example of what I am talking about:

It was February 14th 2009 and I was just about to head off to my then boyfriends house (He was going to take me out to dinner and then we were going to go over and watch movies at his house), when I noticed a missed call from Nesia.

I called her back and she asked if she could stop by.

Knowing Levi wouldn’t be home for a few hours, and that I had a few minutes to spare before I had to leave, I said “yes of course” and told her that I had something for her when she arrived.

About five minutes later she pulled up. When I answered the door I saw her standing there with two huge beautiful bouquets’ of flowers. Orange for me, because she knew its my favorite color, and purple for my mom, because that is her favorite. (I think we got her flowers and a teddy bear.)

After we exchanged gifts and chatted for a bit, we walked out together and both left the house at the same time. She was only at our house for about 5-7 minutes.

After my boyfriend and I returned from dinner, and were back at his house watching movies with his mom and step dad, I noticed a few text messages on my phone from Bristol.

This is what she wrote, “How f**king dumb could you be to have Lanesia stop by your house? You will never see your nephew again!” and about four other texts that were just as hurtful and filled with rage.

I let my boyfriend read them as I just sat stunned with disbelief. He read it out loud to his parents and his mom said you should text her back and tell her to grow up.

I contemplated replying but decided not to because, no matter what I say, it will never be good enough. I obeyed her demands, and didn’t have Lanesia come over while Levi was home there so we wouldn’t have a problem, and it still was not enough.

I tried not to let the messages ruin my night as I sat and finished watching the movies with my boyfriend and his parents. Afterward, around 10 PM I returned home. As soon as I walked in my front door I automatically I felt that something was wrong.

As I entered the house I saw my brother laying on the living room couch with this kind of puzzled, upset look on his face, which I had not seen since we were kids and overheard our parents discussing getting a divorce.

Because Levi is such a private person I decided not to ask him any questions and instead went upstairs to ask mom if she knew what was wrong.

She stood up and said “Guess who called me?”

I had no idea and asked “Who?” She said “Bristol! And she exploded and went off on me”.

I was pretty shocked and more than a little confused. “Why? What did she say?” I asked.

Mom told me, with tears running down her face in anger, that Bristol had called her and exploded in anger, screaming at her and saying “How dare you allow Lanesia to stop by your house!”, and that was the reason we will never see Tripp, because “girls like that are stopping by!” She then claimed that we had a chaotic f**cked up family and then went on to compare Lanesia, Levi’s teenage middle school girlfriend, to the woman my father had cheated on my mother with.

I was in complete disbelief that my brother’s girlfriend/fiancé would call the grandmother of her newborn son and scream at her just because an ex-girlfriend of Levi’s had stopped by for a few minutes to drop off a gift. It was absolutely surreal.

I was so incredibly angry that I went straight downstairs to ask my brother what the heck was going on and how Bristol even knew Lanesia had stopped by?

Levi said that apparently one of her friends drove by and saw Lanesia’s truck at our house.

Levi looked extremely depressed and held up his cellphone saying “Look.”

I did as he asked and this is what I read. “Ever since the moment I found out I was pregnant I prayed to God you weren’t the father!”

I will not lie on my blog, so I will admit that I cried. I had quite a few tears streaming down my cheek as I hugged my brother and tried to comfort him.

I told him how sorry I was, and that I didn’t realize having my friend over would cause such turmoil. He said not to worry about it and it and that it wasn’t my fault.

My point in telling this story is to illustrate that Bristol has always had a huge problem with Lanesia and was always super self conscious when it came to her and Levi.

Since Levi and Bristol got back together he has now tried to contact me only twice.

Once demanding that I take my blog down, and the second was when he called my mom’s phone demanding that I give him Lanesia’s cell phone number so he could call her in front of Bristol and prove he isn’t the father of her unborn child. In response I told him that because I had been so desperate to see my nephew I hadn’t even talked to Lanesia in several months. I told him I did not even have her new number ( I could tell that I was on speaker phone and knew that Bristol was listening to make sure Levi did as she demanded).

He then asked “Have I been with Lanesia” (Obviously he was hoping that if I said he hadn’t been with her that would be enough to calm Bristol down.) I replied “ Well, Levi how would I know? Despite Bristol’s claims I don’t make you sleep with other women. But I believe with all my heart that you have not slept with her.”

Then he hung up on me. “Well” I thought “that’s the end of that!”

This all took place about a week or two ago. Yesterday I received several e-mails with links claiming Lanesia is currently pregnant with Levi’s kid.

I have talked to both Lanesia and Levi and both have said that is a lie.

Lanesia says she is 100% sure that she is pregnant with her boyfriend’s child and desperately wants all these rumors put to rest.

She says there is NO way that this child is Levi’s.

I do not think there is any way this child could be my brother’s either, although that would be a bitter sweet miracle. I say bitter because of the repercussions it would have on my brother and his relationship with Bristol, and sweet because I know Lanesia would love nothing more then to have my mother and myself in her child’s life because she knows we are very kind people who would be a great aunt and grandmother to her baby. Even if others may not agree.

Either way I am very happy for my friend Lanesia and just KNOW she will make a great mother.